Table of contents:
- Have you ever met someone who leaves you exhausted from just talking to him / her? That is to say, you feel that it leaves you without energy to listen to their complaints, criticisms and others … if so, you have run into an emotional vampire
- The victim
- The controller
- The narcissistic
- The talker
Have you ever met someone who leaves you exhausted from just talking to him / her? That is to say, you feel that it leaves you without energy to listen to their complaints, criticisms and others … if so, you have run into an emotional vampire
An emotional vampire is someone who steals all the positive energy and self-esteem from a person or a group of people. Also, the emotional vampire uses manipulative techniques to always accomplish what he wants at the expense of others.
Due to the great impact that emotional vampires can have on your life, it is very important that you learn to identify them and stay away from them. Here are some signs to watch out for to avoid falling into the traps of an emotional vampire.
Psychiatry expert Judith Orloff describes the predominant types of emotional vampires through the Psychology Today portal:
These types of people have attitudes of desolation and sadness ALL the time. For them, the world is against them and they always put a 'but' when you try to give them a solution. As a friend, sometimes you hesitate to call him since you know he will complain about something.
To protect yourself against this type of emotional vampire, Judith Orloff recommends setting firm but gentle limits. Make it very clear that you only have a few minutes to talk or simply point out that this is not a good time.
This type of emotional vampire has an immense need to control how you should feel, what you should think, and what you should do. They usually do less with your opinions or ways of seeing life, putting their rules first. They always have an opinion about everything, even if they don't know the subject.
To take care of them, the expert advises to thank when they give you advice, but to let them know that it is you who makes the decisions in your life. Be sure of yourself and don't let yourself be victimized.
It is all about them. They die for attracting attention and for always being praised. They have a huge lack of empathy, making it very difficult for them to put themselves in someone else's shoes. The most dangerous thing about narcissists is that they are selfish and have very little ability to love unconditionally.
The moment you identify one, walk away! It is extremely easy to relate to narcissistic people and not know it; therefore, keep your limits and expectations at a safe level for you. The advantage is that when the narcissist does not receive the attention he wants, he moves away little by little.
What Judith Orloff defines as “the constant talker” are those people who do not stop talking, not even to know how your day has gone. It is all about them, their thoughts and feelings. They always have you waiting for a pause so you can speak, but that pause never comes. Also, they tend not to respect personal space during their conversations.
To avoid this type of emotional vampire, you must first know that they don't know body language. So when you want to put up a barrier it should be with words and not just physically moving away from them. The most direct is always the best with these types of people.
Some of the effects your body experiences after living with an emotional vampire are tiredness, headache, and a bad mood. Try to identify the people who make you feel this way and, if possible, keep your distance.